Debbie Burgin

Because Mom's Work is REALLY Never Done
The Empty Nester and The Power of ‘Naked’

The Empty Nester and The Power of ‘Naked’

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As I think I’ve probably said on this blog like…a million times, I’ve been ‘single without children’ for about a year now (“single without children” is my replacement phrase for “empty nester”).

In the year since the kids moved out, I’ve moved from a big house in the suburbs, to a cute little condo downtown. My life has done a complete 180, and I’m loving every second of it.

In recent months, I’ve started thinking about my living space as a place where I can do whatever the hell I want to, now that the kids are gone. In that spirit, I’ve started doing things a little differently.

For instance, when I get out of bed in the morning, I make my coffee, and I crank up my laptop, but putting clothes on, isn’t something that I’m in any particular hurry to do. This is new for me. I’ve never been the kind of person who was particularly comfortable being ‘naked’. Just doing whatever I do, without clothes on, is a weird concept, and at the same time…it’s really not.

Does that make sense?

I think that my brain has decided that “this is my space. I don’t have to be any particular type of way for anyone. Not anymore…” and I really like it.

I’ve also taken to staying in bed until I’m damn good and ready to leave it.

Today is Sunday, and my daughter called this morning at about 10 to see if I wanted to grab coffee and go shopping with her. I looked at my phone for the time, and seeing that it was only 10 am, I said, “today is Sunday, yes?” she replied “yes”, then as I looked out at the clear blue sky through my bedroom window I said, “I’m not looking to leave this bed any time soon. I’m just going to chill and let the day go by today…”

She groaned, and muttered something about it being a beautiful day, but I didn’t care.

When the kids were little, my life was littered with doing shit that I didn’t want to do, but had to because my family needed me to; getting up early for school, driving to this or that lesson or game, picking up from this friend’s house, dropping off at that friend’s house. It was endless. But it was all my job to do.

I don’t have to do those things anymore. My time is my own. I do what I want, and I don’t do what I don’t want to do. Period.

Being naked is an amazing feeling. It’s a metaphor for many other things in life at this moment. It might not be your metaphor, but I’m sure that if you think about it, you’ll see that you have one 😉

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